I am well into my 70s and I love my overalls, both pairs. Got 'em on eBay. Buy the damn overalls! They're comfortable and practical. Wear them until they shred, then patch them and bleach them and wear them some more. And don't worry about how they look. You'll become invisible soon, so it doesn't matter.
Ha! One of the perks of growing older is invisibility. The other is being able to speak your mind freely (or at least more freely than my younger self did). eBay, here I come!
I'm 57, and invisibility is already descending on me like a superpower. I own two pairs of overalls, short and long. I regularly get compliments on them from younger people. It's not about whether I look great so much as I look like someone who knows who she is and what she likes and to hell with anyone who disagrees with either of those things.
Freedom begins in middle age, and it begins when you quit giving a fuck about how you look in something that makes you happy.
100 percent this: "It's not about whether I look great so much as I look like someone who knows who she is and what she likes and to hell with anyone who disagrees with either of those things.
Freedom begins in middle age, and it begins when you quit giving a fuck about how you look in something that makes you happy."
YES, a thousand times yes. I still can't get over how long it's taken me to figure out who I am and what I like. (I'll be 57 this summer, so right behind you.) Not giving a fuck what other people think goes a long way toward being able to achieve that insight. 😊
Ah, you are in my tribe. I am 72 and I have at least 10 pairs of overalls…denim, corduroy, fancy crepe ones. I adore my overalls. It makes me feel hidden, even though I have become invisible to the general public. At my age, I eat cookies when I feel like it and dress in a way that gives me security and comfort. Buy the damn overalls!
Joyce, given how many not *quite* right overalls I own, I may need to slow down the buying until I find the perfect pair. Not only will they set my life to rights, but they will also have ample pockets for cookies (unrepentantly eating cookies along with invisibility are at least two perks of growing older 😂)
Several have commented about invisibility. It makes me wonder—are we subject to invisibility because of the focus on youth in a culture saturated by air-brushed ads? How tragic that we no longer honor the wisdom of the older generations.
Excellent points made! I am 72 and have not pursued “youth” for a long long time. I have earned my rips and tears and just enjoy each day of life, however much longer I have in this material plain. I love fabric, garments and style…but I do not dress for fashion but for function and comfort. I appreciate your deep and thoughtful take on all this. Keep writing!!!
My holy grail is huaraches sandals…big heavy leather-strapped with authentic tire track soles that conformed to your feet after getting wet in the rain. I loved those damn things. Perfect with a pair of Levi’s straight legs and a simple white tee. 🙏🏻❤️
This summer I chased my youth in a sugar bowl hunt. Not just any sugar bowl, but the same exact knobby lidded 1960s Franciscan Stoneware (green band!) that were our dishes as kids and which my sister reminded me of when she saw a set in a local vintage shop where we grew up amd she still lives. I had almost forgotten about those dishes my mother had long ago quietly traded in for the newest trend in 70s brown, but I had always loved them, especially the tactile joy of lifting the lid on the sugar bowl by a perfectly sized blob of a knob.
The only problem was that my dad was a dentist, which meant sugary food was kept at an absolute minimum in our house except for Halloween, (he still threw out 2/3 of our haul but hey, it never deterred our efforts each year) Christmas and Easter, because you know, he loved his Sees Chocolates too. The must-have magic of the sugar bowl was that it was always out on the counter and my sister, brother and I would sneak spoonfuls of sugar onto our very UNfrosted flakes Saturday mornings when my parents' attention was elsewhere- it was the only time we could pull it off. We'd smile like thieves, suppressing the giggles over our heist and go park ourselves in front of the tv. So simple, and so deeply embedded in the comaraderie, however brief, between us.
It takes just one defining object, scent, sound or picture to trigger that memory of a time and place we'll never get back. How incredibly sweet it is though, when we find just a small token to tangibly connect to the joy again. Sugar for your coffee, tea or cornflakes? I got you covered. Irena, I sincerely hope you find those overalls
...and just like that, you've conjured the sugar bowl with the satisfyingly perfect knobby handle back to its green-banded life. LOVE this. Even if we never find the tangible token again, just sharing the deep nostalgia and the visceral memories with others who get it is *almost* as good.
Sharing memories with the human in crime, or time of your lives can never be replaced by the THING, agreed! I am so grateful my sister is around to stir up all those fun times we had but I even surprised myself at how much damn joy that sugar bowl brings me. Though you will always have Tracey's treasured friendship, I really want those overalls to find you because you can rock anything!
I too wore the overalls along with my BFF from college. We looked young, carefree when in fact we were tormented, carrying baggage. I bet now we would more accurately match the overalls vibe in midlife giving zero effs! Get the overalls! I may need to go look for some myself 🫶🏼
Ok I get that the greater point of the story is not really overalls lol BUT have you tried the Current Elliot ranch hand overalls??? They are the ones that Lily Tomlin wears in Grace and Frankie. I went on my own overall quest a few years ago and found them to be perfect!
This is what I live for—the point of the story is not really overalls but… kinda? Lily Tomlin is my superhero and I am going to be checking out Current Elliot RIGHT NOW
I kept those overalls—they were Old Navy. I remember wearing them with a little white crop the way Jen Aniston did… or a tiny tank with a big yellow smiley face. They fit stunningly over my tight, tan, teenage body—you’re right, the perfect metaphor of our youth.
I came across them in an old box the other day, but I didn’t dare try to squeeze my 40-something, post-baby body into them. There was something sad and beautiful about all that promise reduced to a pile of jean and buttons.
I set them aside so that my daughter can someday wear them to a 90’s dance at school. I’ll never recover that time in my life, but I console myself that I got to live it.
OMG, I *knew* they were Old Navy! You are so smart to have kept yours. I'm a little bit jealous, although I suspect they wouldn't fit 2024 me the way they fit 1995 me.
But you're absolutely right: so bittersweet to let the overalls go, and yes, we're lucky that we got to live the overalls life once upon a time.
Yessss! I found some in a Colorado thrift shop and fully expected them to be a portal to my 90s self! Very Hot Tub Time Machine… :) Now I keep them in my closet & they’re more like a touchstone.
Irena...yes to this! I'm a 73 year old woman who was a hippie during the early 1970s. That hippie is still part of who I am, and I am attracted to bell bottom jeans and peasant blouses, boots and lots of rings. I have toned it down a LOT but I find myself looking online at twenty-somethings modeling the clothes I love and reminding myself, "But that's not how they would look on you." It's a quandry!
My new mantra that I try to repeat to myself is “mediated desire” (a term I picked up in grad school that has proven to be far more useful in real life). In other words, do I want the actual clothes or do I want the clothes so I can look like the gorgeous young thing modeling the clothes? There’s an obvious answer here, but what if you don’t like the obvious answer? A quarry indeed.
I’m a fan of the REI overalls personally though they’re not denim. Definitely more carhartt vibes. But they fit me like the grown ass woman that I am lol.
Oh my god I hope that comment of mine didn’t come across as condescending 😅. I meant like… I have big curvy hips/butt, but they still fit me well haha.
Totally not, and thanks to you I am heading down the REI rabbit hole. I had no idea when I posted the original piece that I would get so many spectacular leads on overall sources!
Yes, my initial use was for gardening but then I had a foot surgery requiring a “boot” for several weeks; the overalls were perfect for wearing over the boot. Barrier broken! No going back now.
Sara, thank you. And I think… yes? It feels like it’s accumulating experience and wisdom only to discover that no one wants to hear what you’ve learned, that you’ve become invisible (except for when you’re urgently needed). But also, it’s becoming more attuned to the unexpected gift of connection and the sparks of beauty in unexpected places, and sometimes that can be enough. (And, of course, also not.)
☝️This comment is almost as great as your initial post. “It feels like accumulated wisdom..” ,“becoming invisible , except when needed,” “ beauty in unexpected places..”.
Words in my head- that you managed to pin down. Truly wonderful!
I clicked on this for a style tutorial, as a clueless middle-aged woman, but what I actually got was so much more! And I immediately sent this to my own Tracy, with whom I feel like I've had all of these conversations and more. A beautiful reflection on friendship.
Thank you so much, Rosalind—I'm glad you got more than what you were expecting, because I am literally the last person in the world to be qualified to do a style tutorial :-).
And hooray for your own Tracy, because as far as I'm concerned, *everyone* should have a Tracy!
What a great read. You know what I zeroed in on? Your daughter. Because of what I do and the history with my own son, that one line landed hard. I hope she is well and that was a one-off issue.
I am well into my 70s and I love my overalls, both pairs. Got 'em on eBay. Buy the damn overalls! They're comfortable and practical. Wear them until they shred, then patch them and bleach them and wear them some more. And don't worry about how they look. You'll become invisible soon, so it doesn't matter.
Ha! One of the perks of growing older is invisibility. The other is being able to speak your mind freely (or at least more freely than my younger self did). eBay, here I come!
I'm 57, and invisibility is already descending on me like a superpower. I own two pairs of overalls, short and long. I regularly get compliments on them from younger people. It's not about whether I look great so much as I look like someone who knows who she is and what she likes and to hell with anyone who disagrees with either of those things.
Freedom begins in middle age, and it begins when you quit giving a fuck about how you look in something that makes you happy.
100 percent this: "It's not about whether I look great so much as I look like someone who knows who she is and what she likes and to hell with anyone who disagrees with either of those things.
Freedom begins in middle age, and it begins when you quit giving a fuck about how you look in something that makes you happy."
YES, a thousand times yes. I still can't get over how long it's taken me to figure out who I am and what I like. (I'll be 57 this summer, so right behind you.) Not giving a fuck what other people think goes a long way toward being able to achieve that insight. 😊
Ah, you are in my tribe. I am 72 and I have at least 10 pairs of overalls…denim, corduroy, fancy crepe ones. I adore my overalls. It makes me feel hidden, even though I have become invisible to the general public. At my age, I eat cookies when I feel like it and dress in a way that gives me security and comfort. Buy the damn overalls!
Joyce, given how many not *quite* right overalls I own, I may need to slow down the buying until I find the perfect pair. Not only will they set my life to rights, but they will also have ample pockets for cookies (unrepentantly eating cookies along with invisibility are at least two perks of growing older 😂)
Exactly...invisible! LOL. I'm 73 and I know that well.
Several have commented about invisibility. It makes me wonder—are we subject to invisibility because of the focus on youth in a culture saturated by air-brushed ads? How tragic that we no longer honor the wisdom of the older generations.
Excellent points made! I am 72 and have not pursued “youth” for a long long time. I have earned my rips and tears and just enjoy each day of life, however much longer I have in this material plain. I love fabric, garments and style…but I do not dress for fashion but for function and comfort. I appreciate your deep and thoughtful take on all this. Keep writing!!!
"I earned my rips and tears." Love that—wisdom to live by!—and thank you so much for your kind words!
My holy grail is huaraches sandals…big heavy leather-strapped with authentic tire track soles that conformed to your feet after getting wet in the rain. I loved those damn things. Perfect with a pair of Levi’s straight legs and a simple white tee. 🙏🏻❤️
I had those and they were the BEST. And there are few things more iconic than a pair of Levi's and a simple white tee.
This summer I chased my youth in a sugar bowl hunt. Not just any sugar bowl, but the same exact knobby lidded 1960s Franciscan Stoneware (green band!) that were our dishes as kids and which my sister reminded me of when she saw a set in a local vintage shop where we grew up amd she still lives. I had almost forgotten about those dishes my mother had long ago quietly traded in for the newest trend in 70s brown, but I had always loved them, especially the tactile joy of lifting the lid on the sugar bowl by a perfectly sized blob of a knob.
The only problem was that my dad was a dentist, which meant sugary food was kept at an absolute minimum in our house except for Halloween, (he still threw out 2/3 of our haul but hey, it never deterred our efforts each year) Christmas and Easter, because you know, he loved his Sees Chocolates too. The must-have magic of the sugar bowl was that it was always out on the counter and my sister, brother and I would sneak spoonfuls of sugar onto our very UNfrosted flakes Saturday mornings when my parents' attention was elsewhere- it was the only time we could pull it off. We'd smile like thieves, suppressing the giggles over our heist and go park ourselves in front of the tv. So simple, and so deeply embedded in the comaraderie, however brief, between us.
It takes just one defining object, scent, sound or picture to trigger that memory of a time and place we'll never get back. How incredibly sweet it is though, when we find just a small token to tangibly connect to the joy again. Sugar for your coffee, tea or cornflakes? I got you covered. Irena, I sincerely hope you find those overalls
...and just like that, you've conjured the sugar bowl with the satisfyingly perfect knobby handle back to its green-banded life. LOVE this. Even if we never find the tangible token again, just sharing the deep nostalgia and the visceral memories with others who get it is *almost* as good.
Sharing memories with the human in crime, or time of your lives can never be replaced by the THING, agreed! I am so grateful my sister is around to stir up all those fun times we had but I even surprised myself at how much damn joy that sugar bowl brings me. Though you will always have Tracey's treasured friendship, I really want those overalls to find you because you can rock anything!
Everyone makes an exception to the rules for See's!
At least those of us raised in a certain bygone era!
I too wore the overalls along with my BFF from college. We looked young, carefree when in fact we were tormented, carrying baggage. I bet now we would more accurately match the overalls vibe in midlife giving zero effs! Get the overalls! I may need to go look for some myself 🫶🏼
If I ever find the perfect pair of overalls I am never wearing anything else!!!
Ok I get that the greater point of the story is not really overalls lol BUT have you tried the Current Elliot ranch hand overalls??? They are the ones that Lily Tomlin wears in Grace and Frankie. I went on my own overall quest a few years ago and found them to be perfect!
This is what I live for—the point of the story is not really overalls but… kinda? Lily Tomlin is my superhero and I am going to be checking out Current Elliot RIGHT NOW
Your Substack always lowers my blood pressure, improves my mood, and gives me a healthy, youthful glow. So many great things in this piece.
Thank you thank you thank you!!! xo
I kept those overalls—they were Old Navy. I remember wearing them with a little white crop the way Jen Aniston did… or a tiny tank with a big yellow smiley face. They fit stunningly over my tight, tan, teenage body—you’re right, the perfect metaphor of our youth.
I came across them in an old box the other day, but I didn’t dare try to squeeze my 40-something, post-baby body into them. There was something sad and beautiful about all that promise reduced to a pile of jean and buttons.
I set them aside so that my daughter can someday wear them to a 90’s dance at school. I’ll never recover that time in my life, but I console myself that I got to live it.
Thank you for this trip down memory lane.
OMG, I *knew* they were Old Navy! You are so smart to have kept yours. I'm a little bit jealous, although I suspect they wouldn't fit 2024 me the way they fit 1995 me.
But you're absolutely right: so bittersweet to let the overalls go, and yes, we're lucky that we got to live the overalls life once upon a time.
Yessss! I found some in a Colorado thrift shop and fully expected them to be a portal to my 90s self! Very Hot Tub Time Machine… :) Now I keep them in my closet & they’re more like a touchstone.
This was a great read!
Thank you so much! I am blown away by how a pair of overalls can bring back SO many memories. Hot Tub Time Machine is a perfect description!
Irena...yes to this! I'm a 73 year old woman who was a hippie during the early 1970s. That hippie is still part of who I am, and I am attracted to bell bottom jeans and peasant blouses, boots and lots of rings. I have toned it down a LOT but I find myself looking online at twenty-somethings modeling the clothes I love and reminding myself, "But that's not how they would look on you." It's a quandry!
My new mantra that I try to repeat to myself is “mediated desire” (a term I picked up in grad school that has proven to be far more useful in real life). In other words, do I want the actual clothes or do I want the clothes so I can look like the gorgeous young thing modeling the clothes? There’s an obvious answer here, but what if you don’t like the obvious answer? A quarry indeed.
Beautiful story, beautiful writing. I'm so glad this came across my notes feed ☺️
Catherine, thank you so much, and so glad you’re here!
I’m a fan of the REI overalls personally though they’re not denim. Definitely more carhartt vibes. But they fit me like the grown ass woman that I am lol.
That. Is. Brilliant. Why did I not think of REI, being a grown ass woman and whatnot? 🤣
Oh my god I hope that comment of mine didn’t come across as condescending 😅. I meant like… I have big curvy hips/butt, but they still fit me well haha.
Totally not, and thanks to you I am heading down the REI rabbit hole. I had no idea when I posted the original piece that I would get so many spectacular leads on overall sources!
I have the dark tan/brown ones (I want to say walrus brown?) and I bought a white pair I plan to dye a deep cranberry red.
3 words. Duluth Trading Company. I’m 67.
I can vouch for those three words- I have their overalls for gardening and I love 'em!
Yes, my initial use was for gardening but then I had a foot surgery requiring a “boot” for several weeks; the overalls were perfect for wearing over the boot. Barrier broken! No going back now.
The number of leads for cool stuff that's come across the comments section is insane. Thank you for adding DTC, Julie—I will be checking it out!
My second child has no rubber band either. Also, likely autistic.
My free time now consists of Poshmark, Zillow and dating apps.
There’s something beautiful and tragic about the relatability of this piece. Is this modern womanhood?
Sara, thank you. And I think… yes? It feels like it’s accumulating experience and wisdom only to discover that no one wants to hear what you’ve learned, that you’ve become invisible (except for when you’re urgently needed). But also, it’s becoming more attuned to the unexpected gift of connection and the sparks of beauty in unexpected places, and sometimes that can be enough. (And, of course, also not.)
☝️This comment is almost as great as your initial post. “It feels like accumulated wisdom..” ,“becoming invisible , except when needed,” “ beauty in unexpected places..”.
Words in my head- that you managed to pin down. Truly wonderful!
Thank you so, so much. This whole comments section is giving me life.
I clicked on this for a style tutorial, as a clueless middle-aged woman, but what I actually got was so much more! And I immediately sent this to my own Tracy, with whom I feel like I've had all of these conversations and more. A beautiful reflection on friendship.
Thank you so much, Rosalind—I'm glad you got more than what you were expecting, because I am literally the last person in the world to be qualified to do a style tutorial :-).
And hooray for your own Tracy, because as far as I'm concerned, *everyone* should have a Tracy!
Style tutorials from unqualified women might be a niche worth exploring here on Substack!
I'm looking forward to reading more of your work, Irena!
What a great read. You know what I zeroed in on? Your daughter. Because of what I do and the history with my own son, that one line landed hard. I hope she is well and that was a one-off issue.
Thank you! It's been a journey, to say the least, but I'm happy to say that she is indeed well. Glad to connect with you here.
I’m so very happy to hear that!